Me vs. my family

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I should really speak up one of these days. I love my family but my son has a mother and that’s me. I am a good mother and I know my son best, so why is that every time my family gets together I feel like my son has ten mothers. Because when my son acts out in any way, almost every person in the room feels the need to “help” me by offering their opinion on how to fix the problem. And most the time I don’t even get to handle the problem before someone else has jumped in and fixed it for me. I hate that.

Every year I say I am not going to let the above happen and it does. My sister is the worse and she doesn’t even have kids. She is so cut and dry sometimes that it drives me nuts. Her personality is stronger than mine and I should tell her to back off but I don’t. I love my sister and she is a wonderful aunt to my son and she just wants whats best but sometimes she needs to learn to back off and let me be my son’s mother.

I may not always handle the problem in the best way but I know what I am doing and I know how to handle my son. Does anybody know what I am talking about? Ever had this happen to you? I apologize for venting but I needed to get this off my chest.

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7 thoughts on “Me vs. my family

  1. Know it, seen it, been there… Turkey has a population of 74 million mothers, and half of those are male.

    I remember when C.S.Jnr was about 6m old, and we had visited my in-laws at a ‘camp’ where they stay every summer, so they knew ‘everyone’. At one point kiddo cried, when I was changing him. About 18 descended on me, panicking “ne oldu?” (what’s wrong?)… followed by a stream of advice from all 18 at once. After 15-20 seconds, in my halting Turkish I blurted out “S T O P…. He’s a baby, he cries, that’s his job. Now BACK OFF!”. They still think I am weird, but just put it down to being “yabancı” (foreigner) 🙂

    Even now at age 6, the grandparents want to ‘sit and watch’ him doing homework, congratulating him on every word he writes. With 6+ pages a night to complete, I usually order them out the room after the first 10 minutes, or the poor lad won’t get his work done; and then who suffers?

    His paediatrician once told us when he was 18m old that, like Calpol, ‘relatives’ should only be prescribed in small doses.

    Be strong!

  2. I don’t have kids yet, but I’ve been facing this same sort of problem (needing to speak up and tell people to back off, but not being able to) every year when I see my family for the holidays. This year I was even stressed about it beforehand, and had a bad case of “if anybody so much as blinks out of line this year I swear I’m gonna’ s” but of course I bit my tongue again…maybe we both need some lessons in how to stand up to loved ones! Haha.

    • Yea we still had a wonderful Christmas. I love my family don’t get me wrong. But sometimes I think they just need to realize that I am his mother and I decide what is best for him and how to deal with issues, when needed. And yes some lessons would be great. Do you know anybody who can help?

  3. Pingback: Me vs. Family the Struggle for Power | TamekoTheArtist

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